Worst Jokes Ever!!! - Huskytalk.com

**WildWilly** · 09-03-20

Yes

**WildWilly** · 09-03-20

.

**WildWilly** · 09-03-20

.

**WildWilly** · 09-04-20

.

**WildWilly** · 09-04-20

It's a sign

**steve n rose** · 09-04-20

Has Donald been doing a bit of sign writing on the side?

**WildWilly** · 09-05-20

.

**WildWilly** · 09-05-20

.

**WildWilly** · 09-06-20

,

**steve n rose** · 09-06-20

That'not nice, you just have to listen to the saw in the right context.

https://youtu.be/cEQhqNNuicg

**WildWilly** · 09-07-20

Happy Laborweensgivingmas Day

**WildWilly** · 09-07-20

This thread is going to the dogs . . .

**WildWilly** · 09-07-20

.

**WildWilly** · 09-08-20

,

**WildWilly** · 09-09-20

.

**Richard230** · 09-09-20

Kiwi slang.

**WildWilly** · 09-10-20

.

**Richard230** · 09-10-20

The whole idea behind recharging a battery is revolting.

**steve n rose** · 09-10-20

Watt's that?

**WildWilly** · 09-10-20

.

**WildWilly** · 09-11-20

All I want is to be as happy as the men on Maury when they find out they're not the father.

**WildWilly** · 09-11-20

.

**Richard230** · 09-11-20

Lost Words From Our Childhood.

Mergatroyd! Do you remember that word? Would you believe the spell-checker did not recognize the word Mergatroyd? Heavens to Mergatroyd!

The other day a not so elderly (I say 75) lady said something to her son about driving a Jalopy; and he looked at her quizzically and said, "What the heck is a Jalopy?" He had never heard of the word jalopy! She knew she was old ... But not that old.

Well, I hope you are Hunky Dory after you read this and chuckle.

About a month ago, I illuminated some old expressions that have become obsolete because of the inexorable march of technology. These phrases included: Don't touch that dial, Carbon copy, You sound like a broken record, and Hung out to dry.

Back in the olden days we had a lot of moxie. We'd put on our best bib and tucker, to straighten up and fly right.

Heavens to Betsy! Gee whillikers!
Jumping Jehoshaphat! Holy Moley!

We were in like Flynn and living the life of Riley ; and even a regular guy couldn't accuse us of being a knucklehead, a nincompoop or a pill. Not for all the tea in China!

Back in the olden days, life used to be swell, but when's the last time anything was swell? Swell has gone the way of beehives, pageboys and the D.A.; of spats, knickers, fedoras, poodle skirts, saddle shoes, and pedal pushers.

Oh, my aching back! Kilroy was here, but he isn't anymore.

We wake up from what surely has been just a short nap, and before we can say, "Well, I'll be a monkey's uncle!" Or, "This is a fine kettle of fish!" We discover that the words we grew up with, the words that seemed omnipresent, as oxygen, have vanished with scarcely a notice from our tongues and our pens and our keyboards.

Poof, go the words of our youth, the words we've left behind. We blink, and they're gone. Where have all those great phrases gone?

Long gone: Pshaw, The milkman did it. Hey! It's your nickel. Don't forget to pull the chain. Knee high to a grasshopper. Well, Fiddlesticks! Going like sixty. I'll see you in the funny papers. Don't take any wooden nickels. Wake up and smell the roses.

It turns out there are more of these lost words and expressions than Carter has liver pills. This can be disturbing stuff! (Carter's Little Liver Pills are gone too!)

Leaves us to wonder where Superman will find a phone booth..
See ya later, alligator! Okidoki.

You'll notice they left out "Monkey Business"!!!

**steve n rose** · 09-11-20

I might have to have an Aspro or Bex after all of that malarkey!
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bex_(compound_analgesic)

**WildWilly** · 09-12-20

,

**WildWilly** · 09-12-20

I'll drink to that . . . .

**WildWilly** · 09-12-20

.

**WildWilly** · 09-13-20

A real protest

**Richard230** · 09-13-20

Here is another old-time saying: And the driver replies "No, and I haven't had a ticket since Christ was a Corporal."

**WildWilly** · 09-13-20

Why is vineyard pronounced vinyurd and not Vine Yard?

**WildWilly** · 09-13-20

.

**Richard230** · 09-14-20

And another good response: "Haven't heard that one since before Pontius was a pilot."

**WildWilly** · 09-14-20

What did the elephant say to the naked man? "It's cute, but can you pick up peanuts with it?"

**WildWilly** · 09-14-20

,

**WildWilly** · 09-14-20

,

**WildWilly** · 09-15-20

,

**WildWilly** · 09-15-20

Great bumper sticker . . . .

I'm So Broke I Can't Pay Attention

**WildWilly** · 09-15-20

I'm sure this will shock some of you but thought I would let you all know, that yesterday I volunteered for the vaccine trials for Covid-19, held in Iowa. The vaccine is one that was created in Russia.
I received my first shot yesterday at 4:00 pm, and I wanted to let you all know that it’s completely safe, with иo side effects whatsoeveя, and that I feelshκι χoρoshό я чувствую себя немного странно и я думаю, что вытащил

**WildWilly** · 09-15-20

.

**WildWilly** · 09-16-20

I just found out that Eddie Money didn't sing I've Got Two Chickens To Paralyze

**WildWilly** · 09-16-20

The official shirt of 2020

**WildWilly** · 09-17-20

,

**WildWilly** · 09-18-20

.

**WildWilly** · 09-18-20

..

**WildWilly** · 09-19-20

It's mightier than the sword

**WildWilly** · 09-19-20

.

**WildWilly** · 09-20-20

.

**WildWilly** · 09-20-20

,

**WildWilly** · 09-20-20

Bottoms up

**Richard230** · 09-21-20

Missing Wife

Husband: My wife is missing. She went shopping yesterday and has not come home!
OFFICER:Age?Husband:I'm not sure. Somewhere between 50 and 60. We don't do birthdays.
OFFICER:Height?
Husband:I'm not sure. A little over five-feet tall.
OFFICER:Weight?
Husband:Don't know. Not slim, not really fat.
OFFICER:Color of eyes?
Husband:Sort of brown I think. Never really noticed.
OFFICER:Color of hair?
Husband:Changes a couple times a year. Maybe dark brown now. I can't remember.
OFFICER:What was she wearing?
Husband:Could have been pants, or maybe a skirt or shorts. I don't know exactly.
OFFICER:What kind of car did she go in?
Husband:She went in my truck.
OFFICER:What kind of truck was it?
Husband: A 2017, pearl white Ram Limited 4X4 manufactured September 16th, with 6.4l Hemi V8 engine ordered with the Ram Box bar and fridge option, led lighting, back up and front camera, Moose hide leather heated and cooled seats, climate controlled air conditioning. It has a custom matching white cover for the bed, Weather Tech floor mats. Trailing package with gold hitch, sunroof, DVD with full GPS navigation, satellite radio, Cobra 75 WX ST 40-channel CB radio, six cup holders, 3 USB ports, and 4 power outlets. I added special alloy wheels and off-road Toyo tires. It has custom retracting running boards and under-glow wheel well lighting.

(At this point the husband started choking up.)

OFFICER:Take it easy sir. We'll find your truck.

Thread Tools

Display

Tags for this Thread

Bookmarks

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions